Let’s talk dirty. Sex and the pregnant you.

January 11, 2011 § 1 Comment

So, you’re pregnant. Congratulations! Now what?

I know you’re all mommy warm and fuzzy about the wee one growing inside you, and so you should be. The nine months during which you’ll be carrying your baby will undoubtedly be among the most meaningful, most exciting and most joyous months of your life. Yes, Virginia, there is joy in pregnancy but not pure, unadulterated joy. Being pregnant isn’t all smiles and glow, you know.

For one thing, your breasts are about to swell along with other parts of your body. In all likelihood, at some point early on, your ankles will join with your calves to form cankles. Oh, and you can say “so long for now” to that flat tummy you’re so proud of. You won’t be seeing it for awhile.

And prepare yourself for the mood swings too, and the cravings. Expect to find yourself compelled by sudden urges to eat something strange in the middle of the night. And, should you happen to look down at the pickle sticking out of your ice cream and wonder if it’s okay to have sex, well, the good news is, yes you can. It’s perfectly safe. That, at least, is some consolation for the cankles.

One of the most common questions heard from first time moms-to-be is “can I have sex during pregnancy.” The short and simple answer is that sex is safe during all stages of a normal pregnancy where there is no medical history or indication of a risk of miscarriage or pre-term labor. In general, a healthy pregnant woman can, within reason, do pretty much anything during pregnancy that she can do when she is not pregnant, and that includes having sex. Naturally, this truism does not apply where there are complications, in which case, you’ll want to discuss the risks of having sex with a qualified healthcare professional.

So you’re healthy and your pregnancy is proceeding according to plan and, sure, you can have sex. Question is – “Will you even want to have sex?” Now that’s another kettle of fish.

Just so you know, it’s not uncommon for a woman’s sexual desire to fluctuate wildly during her pregnancy. During the first trimester, for example, when you may be experiencing such symptoms as fatigue, nausea and breast tenderness – not to mention the increased need to urinate – that handsome hunk of man you couldn’t get enough of a few months back might start looking like a hairy ball of yuck to you.

Once those symptoms start to subside, however, you may find your sexual desire returning. You may even find your desire returning with renewed vigor. Now, when you look at that hairy ball of yuck, you’re thinking “hubba hubba”. Don’t ask me why. That’s just the way it is.

And you may very well be amazed at how much fun sex can be without the condoms, IUDs, morning after pills and anxieties about getting knocked up. For many women, sex during pregnancy can be a heightened experience and orgasms even more pleasurable than at other times. Nor is it uncommon for Daddy to feel even closer to Mommy at this special time which can result in an intensified feeling of intimacy for both of you during sex.

So, the long and short on sex during pregnancy is let your body do the talking. If it’s telling you that you want sex, listen up. But, however you and your partner’s sex life may evolve and change during your time of pregnancy, always keep these two very important principles close at hand – one, have a sense of humor about it all because…well…you’re going to need it; and, two, talk talk talk sex as much as you need to in order to keep the lines of communication on this very important aspect of your family life wide open.

Next time, we’ll talk positions. That should be fun so stay tuned….

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